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When An Unexpected Roommate Moves In – Dealing With Your Roommate’s Significant Other

William Paid February 5, 2014 Roommate Relationships 1 Comment


Picture this. Your roommate is getting serious with their significant other. He or she starts staying over at your apartment more and more, and eventually, they are living there full time, using up all the toilet paper, hanging around the common area, and just generally always being there.

Whether you get along with your roommate or not, someone else moving in can complicate matters and turn roommates against each other. You’re rapidly getting fed up with the situation. So, what do you do?

Talk to your roommate. We can’t stress this enough – this should always be the first resort. Tell your roommate how you’re feeling about the situation – then you’ll be able to work it out amongst yourselves. Set boundaries – work out a number of days a week where he/she can be in your apartment, or see if they can start chipping in on the rent payments or other bills, especially if they are eating all your food, or watching TV all day.

If your roommate is less than understanding about these suggestions, you do have other options. Review your lease, and see if it places restrictions on the number of people that can be living in the unit. If it does, you can inform your landlord and let them deal with the problem. However, be aware that this may cause tension between you and your roommate.

If you’re the one in the relationship, here are some tips to keep the peace between you and your roommates:

  • Don’t give out your keys.
  • Don’t take over common spaces.
  • Discuss with your roommate to gage what they would be comfortable with.
  • Be respectful of your roommate’s schedule i.e. don’t make loud noises at night when they have work the next morning.
  • Switch off staying at your place or theirs, to limit the frequency of visits.

While this can be a tricky living situation, open communication and compromise can make dealing with it easier on everyone involved and keep the peace between roommates.

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About The Author

My name is William Paid, Esquire and I’m a serial personal butler with 40 years distinguished service, orchestrating exceptional living experiences for exiled kings, rockstars, supermodels, and even a few “young gun” Internet executives who are now woefully overleveraged and unable to employ my services. My role is to ensure everything runs smoothly for renters and roommates. I’m at YOUR service.